Imagine fields dripping with juicy eggplants and crisp cabbages, ready to slide into your next plant-based masterpiece. Now picture Jessica Soho’s farm-to-market exposé, where corruption in the Philippines fucks over our farmers, leaving that produce to rot like a sad, neglected hard-on. The multi-awarded show, Kapuso Mo’s latest investigation isn’t just a report—it’s a brutal takedown of a system where billions meant for farm-to-market roads vanish into bureaucrats’ back pockets, spiking food loss and waste to criminal levels. These aren’t roads; they’re scams, ensuring our veggie dreams stay limp and unreachable.

Jessica Soho’s Farm-to-Market Exposé: Roads Built to Bust

Soho’s report cuts deep, exposing farm-to-market roads that are less infrastructure and more a circle-jerk of corruption. In rural Philippines, these publicly funded projects—worth billions—are either ghosted, half-built, or so shoddy they crack open like a bad hookup gone wrong. In Nueva Ecija, farmers strap their harvests to inner tubes, paddling across rivers like they’re auditioning for a survivalist OnlyFans. “Been doing this since we were kids,” one grower grumbles, his voice as flat as a spent climax, because promised bridges and tarmac? They’re as real as a catfish profile.

In Cebu’s Mantalongon Mountains, the terrain’s a cruel top—steep, slick, and punishing. Farmers lug 150-kilo sacks of chayote and greens over kilometres, backs bent like they’re deep in a gruelling session. The “finished” roads? They’re so far from the farms, they’re as useless as a broken dildo. The government’s fix? Toss them some cement and a “good luck” wink, leaving growers to play amateur roadbuilder with zero clue. It’s corruption so blatant it’s practically bareback—public funds siphoned through contractors who deliver less than a quickie in a bathhouse. The result? Food loss and waste that’s as inevitable as post-nut clarity.

Food Loss and Waste: The Tragic Money Shot

Here’s the part that stings worse than a bad rimjob: the waste. When the trek to market’s a slog through mud and misery, and the payout’s shite, farmers don’t bother—they let their crops rot. Cabbages curl, eggplants moulder, left in fields like discarded sex toys after a rough night. Worse, these farmers risk their lives just to make a living, navigating treacherous rivers on flimsy rafts or hauling back-breaking loads across cliffs where one slip could mean a broken neck. Soho’s report nails it at 08:18: “They just throw it away or let it rot.”

It’s not just a kick in the balls for farmers; it’s an environmental gangbang, with rotting piles pumping methane like a gas station glory hole. This is food loss and waste on steroids—tonnes of potential vegan fuel trashed because the system’s been screwed harder than a power bottom, while growers dice with death for pennies.

This hits plant-based advocates where it hurts. We’re out here preaching kale and quinoa, but if the supply chain’s clogged by corruption, it’s like jerking off to a fantasy that never lands. Urban eaters pay through the nose for imported greens while local harvests decay, driving up emissions and obesity stats. Farmers, meanwhile, are one misstep from disaster—drowning in rivers or tumbling down ravines—just to get their goods nowhere. It’s a double penetration of public health and sustainability, with corruption as the lube that makes it all slide.

Addressing the Fuckery

Soho doesn’t just expose the rot; she holds a mirror to it, demanding we face the mess. The Jessica Soho farm-to-market saga shows corruption in the Philippines isn’t some abstract wank—it’s the grease that grinds our food system to a halt and puts farmers’ lives on the line. Plant-based pushes, from vegan brunches to policy nerds banging on about meatless Mondays, flop when the basics are buggered. Farmers aren’t just props; they’re the MVPs, slogging like subs in a dungeon, risking death on rickety rafts or treacherous trails, only to see their work wasted. Nueva Ecija’s raft-riders and Cebu’s pack-mule growers deserve better than this circle-jerk of neglect

The ripple effect is brutal. City vegans chase overpriced tomatoes while local bounty festers. Environmentalists tally losses while corruption rules, bloating landfills and emissions. Health crusaders can’t win if the greens never arrive. This isn’t just about food loss and waste—it’s about a system that’s been fucked over so thoroughly, it’s a miracle anything grows at all, let alone reaches market without a farmer’s life hanging in the balance.

Get Involved: Screw Corruption, Save the Sprouts

Time to flip this script. Amplify Soho’s exposé—share the clips, make the crooks sweat. Demand audits tight enough to choke out the graft, real roads that don’t crumble like a bad hookup, and cold chains to keep greens fresh. Push for safety—bridges, not rafts; paths, not precipices—so farmers aren’t gambling their lives for a sale. Plant-based warriors, this is your fight too—push for a supply chain smoother than a well-lubed slide, not one clogged by pilferers. The Philippines’ veggie potential is too lush to let rot.

• GMA Network. (2025 August 31). KMJS: Flood control projects in Pampanga, Tarlac. https://www.gmanetwork.com/news/topstories/regions/957530/kmjs-flood-control-projects-pampanga-tarlac/story/ Note: Ties to the broader corruption narrative, showing how public projects get fucked over. Cited as [8] to amplify Soho’s exposé.
• Kapuso Mo, Jessica Soho. (2025 October 05). Farmers brave muddy roads to sell their crops [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOXf5vbRpso Note: The raw, unfiltered core of the farm-to-market saga, with farmers paddling rafts and humping sacks. Cited as [1] and [5], with the 08:18 mark hitting the food waste money shot.
• Philippine Star. (2024 January 17). DA: 30 percent of crops wasted due to poor logistics. https://www.philstar.com/headlines/2024/01/17/2326363/da-30-percent-crops-wasted-due-poor-logistics Note: Nails the stat that 30% of crops rot due to shite logistics, backing the food loss and waste angle. Cited as [21].
• Philippine Star. (2025 September 19). Farm-to-market road projects under audit. https://www.philstar.com/headlines/2025/09/19/2473874/farm-market-road-projects-audit Note: Exposes the financial shafting, with costs inflated like a greedy bastard’s ego. Cited as [0].